What Women do That Makes Me Laugh

I don't want to sound sexist, but you have to admit that the tricks that women pull to attract men are funny.

The Butt!
Yes, women eventually find out that some men are suckers for women's bumpers. So, they eventually learn to stick it out or swing it a bit more while walking just to attract men's attention. Ironically, the women that mostly do it are the ones that lack it!

The Breasts!
Oh, baby! Another juicy trick! They eventually get the HANG of bouncing it and sticking it out. Sorry for those who are flat, but you've got your pointers, too. (From a man who likes the flatness! Leaves space for imagination!)

The Guilty Routine!
Some of them have the knack of making you feel guilty for what you have done. I.e., when they ask for some money and you refuse, they'll probably go like "You are mean" or "So that's the way you are, huh?" others are pros and go to crying in their performance or bring others to the fight!

The Innocent Routine!
Oh! They must be professionals to pull this off! They pretend that they will never hurt a fly! Acting like little kids and pretending to be friendly! Cunning, huh? But, that's one of the tricks.

Over Flattery! or The Kiss Ass Routine!
Some acquire this technique. They begin to motivate you, saying that you are special or smart or good looking even though you are probably butt-shit ugly and probably a screw ball. It works! Trust me!

The Close Contact!
Oh yes. Some are aggressive and will begin by holding your hands. Then, they start hugging you. And, it continues further down the line. If, you know what I am talking about.

The Live Image!
Some like to give a sample of what they can do. A perfect example is licking a lolly pop or eating a banana slowly.

Well, if you don't learn from this post. My friend, you are in deep trouble. All of this written through experience. So, guys, watch out!